


Entrapment, or: Go the Fuck to Sleep, Reno!

by Kitsu



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: And Lots of It, Cabin Fic, Coffee, Help - We're Stranded, M/M, Mild Blood, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post-Canon, Sorry Not Sorry, Swearing, Tea, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 06:09:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21351511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitsu/pseuds/Kitsu
Summary: Reno gets cabin fever, Vincent Valentine and Tseng fixes it in the most interesting way possible. Post-everything, really.
Relationships: Reno/Tseng/Vincent Valentine
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	Entrapment, or: Go the Fuck to Sleep, Reno!

It didn’t happen too often, but whenever it did, Reno felt like he had caught a bad case of the cage crazies. Spending time alone with Tseng and Vincent Valentine in the same room for an extended period was simply excruciating. Them giving each other, and him, the silent treatment for hours on end frayed his nerves, and he’d always start pacing within the first hour or so. Whenever Rude came along they’d always play a card game or two, or if Elena accompanied them she and Reno would run through the entire portfolio of office gossip. But alone he felt like a trapped animal in too small an enclosure.

—

This time they had been tracking some crazyass Hojo-experiment Valentine had some decent leads on when a sandstorm had trapped them in a tiny, run down cabin at the edges of Corel Desert. The raging storm apparently wreaked havoc with radio signals, and they were completely out of touch with base. Radio gave nothing but frenzied static. 

—

As usual, within an hour Reno was endlessly pacing, drawing exasperated glances from the two other men, They had found a corner each, huddling up and resting quietly. Reno didn’t do quiet. Not for more than three seconds consecutively, max. His internal monologue needed an out or he’d drive himself crazy. He was talking to himself, muttering under his breath about gods-be-damned sandstorms and deserts and stupid missions. Knowing he was probably annoying the shit out his companions he tried to keep it down, but if he had to stay completely silent he’d soon start banging his head against the wall.

—

After about two hours he had started wringing his hands as he paced, popping his knuckles at uneven intervals.

— 

After four, he was loudly cursing at the storm, screw anyone else and their delicate ears. Valentine and Tseng hadn’t spoken for the full 4 hours, but glances where being cast, both between themselves and at Reno’s back.

—

When complete darkness fell a couple of hours later, the storm still raging at full force, Tseng had had enough. “Reno,” he hissed, stopping him dead in his tracks.

Reno’s attention snapped to his boss, and he shoved his hands into his pockets to keep them from fidgeting.

“Looks like we’re here for the night. Calm yourself, you’re being a nuisance.”

“But, gah… I’m so extremely, extremely, fucking bored, yo.” Reno could hear the whiny edge to his voice, but fuck, a dude needed to keep busy, not stare at walls for hours on end. They didn’t even have a view, outside was a solid wall of dark sand. 

—

Tseng had seen it before, Reno’s cage fever. For some reason Reno just didn’t do well in confined spaces, and it really didn’t take long for him to become infuriatingly fidgety. Reno needed something to do. Well, it had been a few hours, and he was noticing hunger starting to claw at his guts. They didn’t have much in terms of provisions, mission having supposed to simply be a quick tracking mission along the edges of the dessert - but they did have a few basics in a backpack. “Reno, get a fire going, the nights are cold in the desert. We’ll boil up some water for coffee and a few MREs.” And tea for himself, of course, he had a tin of gunpowder green stacked away somewhere in the backpack. Never left base without - nor without a small pot to boil water in and a few cups.  _ Always prepared.  _

Not much wood was available in the cabin, but a few pieces of broken, banged up, old furniture made do. Luckily the pipe was clear of any debris and the wind more than strong enough for the fire to catch properly. It even added a cozy warmth to the small room. 

The cup of coffee and Wutai Pot Noodle MRE he handed to Reno seemed to give him something to focus on, at least for a moment. He offered Valentine a cup coffee as well, but the former Turk pointed at his tin of tea, muttering, “I’d rather have a taste of that if you don’t mind.” Why not, Tseng didn’t mind sharing. He carefully poured them both a cup, still following the procedure he had learned as a child growing up in Wutai.

—

Reno glanced over at them, snorting gleefully. “You two. So damned alike.”

Tseng lifted an eyebrow inquisitively. “How so?” he asked.

“You're a pair of tea-drinking, stoic, irritating, quiet-ass bastards, yo.”

Tseng huffed quietly, too used to Reno’s quips by now to let himself be goaded, and Valentine.... Who knew what he did behind that oversized, bloody dramatic cape collar of his. His eyes betrayed nothing over the cup of steaming tea he was nuzzling in his hands.

“Six hours it took you to say even a single word. It’s not normal, I tell ya. Normal people talk, make conversations to pass time. You guys, you both stare at a wall for hours on end. That’s what crazy people do. And not even the same bloody wall!” 

“I have no need to waste my voice on trivialities,” Tseng quipped, sternly. “I’m perfectly fine spending time contemplating more important issues.”   


“What the heck have ya been contemplating for six hours straight?” Reno’s voice rose slightly, irritation egging him on.

“That’s for me to know and you to wonder,” Tseng answered curtly. 

Reno would still swear he heard mirth in his boss’ voice. Being an annoying prick on purpose then, like only Tseng knew how. “Aww, fucking hell…,” Reno muttered under his breath again. Arguing with Tseng was trying to convince a stone it was a soft, squishy pillow. He never got anywhere. 

Valentine wasn't being very companionable either, sipping his cup of tea silently. As soon as he started nipping at the hot drink, he’d had to pull the collar away from his face for a while. Reno took the opportunity to study his face surreptitiously. Damn, he was a good looking bastard, Reno found himself thinking. Handsome face, shit personality, nonexistent people-skills - but according to a few stray comments he’d overheard from older Turks over the years, it hadn’t always been that way. Reno could sort of see how what Valentine’d been through would screw someone up majorly. At least in this form he was calm, and unobtrusive. The beasts, though… They could terrify a brick wall. Especially Chaos, though luckily that one was gone, permanently. 

The last few years he had often collaborated with them on these kinds of missions. Rufus trying to make amends in his own weird way, and Valentine having no love for Hojo’s creations. Including himself, Reno had noticed. Them teaming up mostly happens when someone picked up on new rumours about crazy monsters showing up somewhere. They’d contact each other and arrange for it to be checked out. Sometimes the rumours panned out and they found some sad, old monstrous being to kill, sometimes the rumours turned out to be duds - simply old wives’ tales. In any case, Valentine was invaluable as a tracker, his ability keen to a point of uncanny. Not surprising, dude was basically a vampire. Quite a few times Reno had felt that the Turks were just tagging along to give Rufus the possibility of calling them successful Shinra clean-up missions. However, he got to fight stuff, had to appreciate that. Keep his skills honed, and all that jazz. Not much else to do these days, and no matter what Rude claimed, being lazy wasn’t really Reno’s thing. He just hated paperwork and skipped out on it as often as possible. Not the same as being lazy, in his honest opinion.

So there they were, two Turks and their tracker stuck in a bloody sandstorm. Until morning, at least. Finishing his coffee and food, Reno managed to stay seated for a full fifteen minutes until the itch got the best of him again. He jumped to his feet, and stretched. Night had fallen, and he’d usually start getting tired soon. However, odd quirk of his - he had trouble sleeping with other people in the room. Which was why he was notorious in certain circles for never staying the night. It was going to be a long one, and he was going to get cranky for sure. A dude needed his beauty sleep. If Tseng found him annoyingly restless before, it was going to get worse. A lot worse. He started pacing again, even counting steps. The room was thirteen by sixteen steps. Thirteen by sixteen. Thirteen by sixteen. Sixteen by thirteen. Twenty by twenty six if he shortened his stride. He started yawning at uneven intervals.

—

Another hour passed before Tseng commented, “Just lie down somewhere and go to sleep, Reno.”

“Not tired, boss.” He could barely hold back a yawn, hiding it behind his hand.

“Liar. You’re a walking endless series of yawns by now.”

“Still couldn’t sleep. People in the room.” He might as well admit it, if not Tseng would get tetchy about it.

“You could try.”

“Not gonna work. Never does. You’ll just have to deal.”

Reno hadn’t expected Valentine to interfere. 

“I could knock him out for you, Tseng.” 

Reno could swear it was a joke, a joke coming from  _ Vincent Valentine _ . That was novel.

“He’d just wake up even more cranky in an hour or so, that skull of his is thicker than that sandstorm out there. Takes a lot more to knock him out for an extended period.”

What the hell, now Tseng was making jokes. What was in that bloody tea of his? Reno scowled. But at least they were talking, or at least making him the butt end of their jokes. Better than dead silence, he thought - though it didn’t last. Tseng and Valentine glanced at each other, lifted an eyebrow each and fell silent again. 

Reno started pacing again. Thirteen by sixteen. Sixteen by thirteen. Back and forth. Forth and back. Was that even an expression? He didn’t even care.

—

Why Valentine was the first to break, Reno would never know. He simply found himself tossed less than gently against the wall, Valentine’s gauntlet pushed against his chest, and his cape a flurry around them. “Stop. Pacing,” was hissed in his ear, Valentine’s voice, but not.

_Oh fuck. Too close. Way too close._ Something in Valentine’s aura was so dark and demanding that Reno snapped back against the wall, staring wide eyed.

The beasts stirred.

Reno swallowed hard. 

So dangerous when agitated.  _ And so. Damn. Hot… Fuck. _

Valentine stared at him, breathed in deeply through his nose - and grinned eerily, then tilted his head away, looking back at Tseng. 

“Tseng. I have an idea for getting him to stop this incessant pacing.” His tone of voice chilled Reno to the bone - it was wrong, not like the Vincent Valentine he had worked with so many times.

“Oh?”, Tseng simply replied.

Why the fuck did Tseng sound amused? Reno was about to hiss something, when Valentine’s mouth was at his ear, tongue flicking against skin. 

“Seems this one likes my beasts a bit more than what healthy is. Smells delicious, he does.“

What the hell was Valentine saying? Reno took a moment to process, before the pieces clicked into place. _ Nonono _ ... No fucking way he could smell that. But then again, as he had already made a mental note of, Valentine wasn’t entirely human, not for many, many years past.

Talking to Tseng again, Valentine continued, “What do you think, would that calm him down? Distract him enough for us to get through this night without having to shoot him?”

Reno didn’t notice, but suddenly Tseng was in his space too, arm rested on Valentine’s shoulder, leaning in. If Reno hadn’t known him better he’d said Tseng was amused. 

“Valentine, I didn’t know you had that in you.”

“Much you do not know about me, Tseng. I’m an old man with a ton of secrets, remember?”

“So not just a broody lone wolf then?”

Valentine chuckled. “No more than you are yourself.”

“And what would you know of that?”

“More than you’d like for me to. Former Turk, remember? I used to do the job, and I was good at it.”

“Prying bastard.”   


“Indeed. And a good one, at that, and don’t you forget. Don’t think I didn’t notice which part of this one’s anatomy your eyes were trailing as he paced. How you kept your calm all evening, I wouldn’t know. You do have such a dirty streak, Tseng. Also, you’re a liar. You know very well what I have in me. Have had in me.”

Tseng just scoffed.

Reno gaped.  _ What the fuck where they on about? _

Valentine leaned in again, mouth against his ear. “You see, Tseng’s eyes has been glued to your behind all evening. Mind, it does look good, I don’t blame him.”

Reno’s mouth opened and closed, like a fish out of water. Those words from Valentine…  _ The literal flying fuck was happening?  _ And Tseng so close - not even trying to deny anything. Someone spiked his coffee. That had to be it. He was hallucinating. Or Valentine had actually knocked him out and his was having a coma nightmare. But his nightmares never felt this realistic, and hallucinations usually involved impossible, nonexistent colours and purple, flying cactuars.

Valentine smirked, tilting his head to Tseng again. “Seems your crew isn’t the sharpest spoons in their drawers, if you’ve managed to hide you little escapades this completely from them.”

Tseng lifted an arm and slogged Valentine in the back of his skull, less than gently, but still playfully. “I’m just as good as you at my job. And they haven’t got your years on their backs, old man. Also, this one…,” he grinned.  _ Actually _ grinned.  _ Oh fuck. _ “This one is a bit slow. Pretty, but slow.”

_ Motherfucker! _ Reno was about to complain, but then Tseng’s fingers found a stray strand of his hair, toying with it. 

“Oh well,” Tseng continued. “Even the slow ones catch up in the end. And times have changed. I suppose, these days military structure and discipline just isn’t us anymore, is it? Time he finds out.” Tseng leaned closer, mouth to Reno’s other ear. “See, the thing this nosy bastard here found out a few years back is that I have certain proclivities outside of work. On my nights off, I used to trawl the lower sectors for pretty redheads to fuck.”

_ Holy hells... _

The snort from Valentine distracted him, stopped him from staring dumbly at Tseng for more than a moment.

“He forgot to tell you one thing there, though. They were all men. Tall, lean, bright blue eyed men with an uncanny resemblance to, well, yourself there. I’d say your boss here has been wanting your pretty ass for years - but knew well enough to no fuck where he eats.” _Who knew Valentine had such a dirty mouth on him? _

Reno swallowed hard, trying to form a sentence. “And you knew? For how long? How? Why? What?” Rambling, yup, no doubt.

“Even monsters get lonely at times. Ended up at the same bar a one point. Found your boss there with major difficulties conjuring up a plausible explanation for the redhead in his lap, so he bought me a whiskey and spilled the beans instead. Turk to former Turk. And I am  _ so  _ very good at keeping secrets, isn’t that right, Tseng?” 

“You damn, deceitful bastard. Shut your mouth.”

Reno hadn’t heard Tseng swear more than a few times, ever - the man the epitome of calm and collected. Until he wasn’t, but that usually just meant someone was about to get a bullet lodged in their brain stem. Around this weird, twisted version of Valentine that apparently no longer held true. They quite obviously knew each other far better than Reno had ever suspected - and even though Tseng scolded Valentine there was  _ warmth _ to his voice.

“What do you say, little Turk? We’ll help you wind the night away, help you sleep, if you let us.”

Looking around quickly, Reno realized the run down room wasn’t really ideal for anything, but really, who was he to turn them down? He was bored, so bored, and Tseng was attractive as hell, and Valentine with his still-lingering tinge of Chaos, of danger, was insanely hot. A once in a lifetime opportunity, he figured.

Slumping against the wall, Reno breathed. Harsh, raggedly.  _ What the hell? _ Repeating himself, yup. Mind a mess, yup. Still, he was go. So very so. Even though he felt extremely outnumbered with the other two hovering over him, in his space. Yet he nodded.

Valentine smirked at Tseng. “Told you so. You should have told him years ago. It’s  _ him _ , after all.” 

Valentine inhaled the air again, a feral glint in his eyes. “Smells so good. Wanting. The both of you.”

Reno could understand why Valentine’s heightened senses could sometimes have him break out of his normal hard shell, divest of his other persona. Pheromones and such, perhaps? And Reno didn’t believe in limiting himself, he was perfectly willing to share. Reaching up he thumbed Valentin’s jaw, fingers moving until he tangled them in dark, soft hair. Pulling Valentine in, he licked along his lower lip, too much teeth and no care, if only to piss of Tseng, just a little bit. For not telling him. Even though they were two against one, Reno still wasn't just going to give in - he’d take his fair share. Valentine growled, low, humming, something deep and primal. Reverberating.

Then Tseng’s hands were at Reno’s chest, trying to unbutton his skirt, but actually pulling a few buttons out. _Desperation. Craving._

Valentine gazed sideways again, at Tseng, and chuckled. “I won’t steal him from you, I’ll just borrow him some.” Then he pulled Reno away from the wall and flipped him, so they were back to chest. Valentine behind him, Reno soon found Tseng closing in on him from the front, dark, stormy eyes. Darker than the angriest Reno had ever seen him, chaos and storm, the black blown out to drown the warmer brown. Dark not with anger, though.

Tseng pushed against him, all fingers tangling in the hair at the back of his head. Lips hard, demanding,  _ bossy. _ As always. Reno tried to reach for him, but then Valentines’s hand and gauntlet captured his wrists, locking them in place behind his back. There were teeth at his neck, sharp, demanding, drowning him. A warm, teasing tongue.  _ Why was Valentine so goddamned warm? _

_ Holy hells _ , Tseng’s hands were demanding, insisting. One tore away from Reno’s hair and immediately found its way to his cock, no hesitation. Stroking him through the fabric of his slacks, turning him oh so hard. Held in Valentine’s vice of a grip, he still tried to push back against the hand, desperately. Tseng chuckled into his mouth, never breaking the demanding, dominating, wonderful kiss. Instead he bit down lightly on Reno’s lips, teeth raking.

“Does he taste of me, Turk?” Vincent’s voice was close to unrecognizable, dark and low, honey and molasses. 

Tseng hummed, affirmingly. For a brief moment, Reno wondered how Tseng would know, and then his mind was filled with dangerous,  _ fucking delicious _ pictures of the two of them together. Yep, the familiarity between them - they’d fucked at some point. Often enough for Tseng to recognize the taste of Valentine. Not a case of opposites attract then, more of a pot-kettle situation. 

Then Reno’s mind gave up on any semblance of coherent cognition. Tseng was devouring him, with mouth and hands, Valentine a rock behind him, hard, so hard, every part of him. Even through layers of clothes, Reno could feel the erection rub against him. Valentine did nothing about it, he simply held Reno in place, an offering to Tseng - though his breathing had an edge to it, an unevenness betraying him. Resting his chin on Reno’s shoulder for a moment, he grinned at Tseng. “Let me taste him as well. Don’t be greedy.” 

Tseng stopped, eyeing Vincent. Licking his lips, he grinned and moved his attention - to Vincent. “I’ll share. A little.” He kissed Vincent, just as demanding, just as wanting. Caught between them, Reno breathed heavily, watching them from the corner of his eye. Fucking beautiful, perfect darkness. Pale skin, long dark hair. The same dominant arrogance - though Valentine apparently hid it better on a daily basis. He wasn’t hiding now, not pretending. This was the core of Vincent Valentine, and  _ hells _ … It was a wondrous thing. 

Valentine let go of Reno’s arms, only to go straight for the zipper in his slacks, making it slide slowly down his thighs until it stuck. Reno was quickly starting to feel quite underdressed compared to the other two. He whined, a desperate sound deep in throat. Hands free, he went straight for Tseng’s tie, pulling it loose and probably ruining it in the process. He wanted to touch skin, warm skin, so badly. Valentine hummed against his ear, approvingly. Apparently he wanted Tseng undressed as well, but his hands were busy, as well as his mouth. Reno took the hint, hungrily undoing Tseng’s shirt, pulling it free from his trousers, exposing his toned chest. 

Vincent joined in, the human hand touching Tseng, fingers hooking his belt, pulling him closer to Reno. 

_ Warm, so warm between them. So hot.  _

Not one to be outdone by the two other, Reno breathed deeply ans rasped, “Fucking undress, the both of you.” 

There was a slight reluctance in Valentine, an uncertainty - but then he and Tseng broke apart, actually obeying Reno. Taking it all in for a moment, he joined them, shrugging his shirt and jacket off his shoulders, stepping out of his slacks. No underwear, wasn’t his style. Ruined the lines of his ass in the uniform. 

Tseng was hard, more muscle than expected from a man in a business suit. The suit hid a multitude of sins, Reno reconned. Sins he was feeling more than happy to partake in. None of them were nineteen and eager, young rookies in the Turks any longer, but none had lost their sharpness. Rather, they were all harder men, all angles and scars, a lifetime of strife cut into their skin. So much better than bodies who had no story to tell. Reno found every scar, ran his fingers across them, drawing a growl from Tseng. 

Vincent Valentine’s naked form told an even more horrible story, explaining his hesitation. The gauntlet didn’t come off, Reno knew as much, and where it ended, and skin started, the scars were still angry red, even so many years later. Every part of him bore some mark, some scar. If Tseng’s scars told stories, Valentine’s were a tome, an epic of old. Reno was intrigued, reaching for Valentine, touching every scar he could reach one by one, gently. His fingers roamed across skin, following when Valentine stepped back, until  _ he  _ was against the wall, instead of Reno. Vincent leaned his head back against the wood, looking down at Reno, eyes half closed. The marred skin was beautiful to Reno, just as beautiful as Tseng’s. Pale white, and so much warmer to the touch than was right for a once dead man. Didn’t faze Reno. Beautiful was beautiful in his eyes, no matter. 

Perfect was boring, anyways. Hard, sharp, dangerous was interesting. Valentine and Tseng were both _ very _ interesting. He wanted it all, wanted to take it all in, wanted to experience it all. 

Snaking closer to Valentine, he wrapped his arms around his waist, grabbing the firm ass. Tseng obviously knew he was attractive, but Valentine seemed to need just a little more affirmation to get him back on the right track. Still grabbing his ass, Reno moved closer, running his tongue across every scar, every piece of sensitized skin he could find, starting from one close to the notch of Valentine’s throat, going lower and lower, until he found himself on his knees, Valentine squirming beneath his mouth. The last scar he found ran down Valentine’s hip bone, ragged, ugly, beautiful. Grinning, he breathed against Valentine’s very erect cock, taking in the sight of it. Hungrily, he ran his tongue across his lips. Yup, pretty, so very pretty. 

Then suddenly he felt Tseng stepping in from the side, and not wanting anyone to feel left out, Reno ran his fingers up Tseng’s leg, just touching lightly. Inviting. Looking up, he saw Tseng tangle a hand in Valentine’s hair, going for his mouth with his own.

_ Fuck yeah _ , was all Reno’s mind could muster at the sight. Having a better view, he indulged in it for a moment. Those two had definitely been at it before. Old familiarity, the easy changes in pushing and pulling, the deference to each other whenever they deemed it suitable. And yet there was room for him between them.

They were so closely pressed together that Reno had a bright idea. On his knees, he wrapped one hand around each hard cock in front of him, his hands’ movements mirrored. Being left-handed, he sometimes had to practice combat using his right as well, and finally he found a use for this learned ambidexterity. The soft noises escaping both before him was music to his ears, and he closed his eyes just to enjoy them. He could feel both shift closer and closer to each others as his fingers moved deftly - until he had another bright idea. Time to put his big mouth to use. Literally. Leaning in he tongued both, in one swipe. Someone yelped, but he didn’t really stop to find out who. The combined taste put every nerve in his body on fire, shivers running down his spine straight for his groin. Using his fingers to bring them both closer, he licked a straight line where skin touched skin, looking up through his bangs to seem them having pulled apart, both with eyes closed, breathing hard between clenched teeth. Valentine stood slumped against the wall, Tseng bracing against it as well, torso tilted forward, his hair having fallen to obscure parts of features. 

_ Motherfuckingholyhell. _ That image would forever be burned into his retinas. How on earth was he supposed to ever work anywhere near Tseng? He was ruined. Completely ruined, for sure. Also, he would never ever be able to look at Vincent Valentine and see the cold, soft spoken gunslinger he pretended to be - because Valentine was  _ fucking molten lava _ , burning hot, inside out. Sex on legs, hiding under that cape of his. Not too shabby for a sixty-something.

Shaking his head, he found his focus again, he used fingers and mouth, tongue and gentle teeth, until the sounds falling down from above were filling him, killing him slowly. Tseng had managed to tangle his free hand in his hair again, not exactly pulling, but still insistent. Valentine ran the sharp points of his gauntlet down the side of Reno’s face - metal sharp enough to cut, but restrained. Two cocks together was hard to fit entirely in his mouth, but he found a rhythm of mouth and hands that seemed efficient.

Suddenly Tseng yanked his head back. “Enough.” His eyes were dark, shining, distant. Oh, he had been close, so close. “Get up.” 

Beside Tseng, Valentine growled, apparently not a hundred percent on board with Tseng’s decision. 

“Just wait,” Tseng shushed him.

Reno was pulled to his feet, less than gently. He understood why though, Tseng was positively vibrating - so tense.

Tseng pushed him against Valentine again. “Keep your hands on him. But don’t let him come yet,” he breathed in Reno’s ear. Reno obliged, wrapping fingers around Valentine’s cock again, keeping a slow rhythm, uneven, unsatisfying. Barely enough. He twitched slightly when he felt Tseng’s palms against his ass, fingers digging into muscle. Yeah, apparently Tseng really did like his ass. It only lasted for a moment, though,before the touch disappeared abruptly. Reno groaned, wanting the touches of them both. He wasn’t kept wanting for long though, Tseng soon returned, however this time his long, strong fingers pushed against Reno’s entrance, into him. They were slicked with something, the Gods only knew where he had been hiding whatever it was. 

And it felt good. Slightly stingy, but so good. Tseng’s fingers were angled differently with each slow thrust, until he found just the right spot, the one the made Reno collapse forward against Vincent. The spot that made him bite down on a pale shoulder in a silent yelp. The spot that made his fingers jerk uncontrollably - leaving Valentine to hiss in his ear. 

_ Motherfuckingholyhellsdamnedbeitall _ , his mind droned. With the odd  _ fuckfucfuckfuckFUCK  _ thrown into the mix.

Tseng seemed impatient, withdrawing his fingers too quickly, in Reno’s opinion. Too quickly only because he enjoyed it so badly, and the emptiness they left needed to be filled so fast, right now. Reno inhaled sharply as he felt the blunt tip of Tseng’s cock rubbed against his ass, also slick. _ Yeah, please _ , his mind begged.  _ Now. Fuck me. _ His breathing was all too ragged for the words to escape his lips, but he sent Tseng a hungry look over his shoulder. Tseng grinned, so fucking hot. So different from his usual cold demeanor. 

Putting one hand on the small of Reno’s back, he urged him to lean forward a bit. Naked feet kicked the inside of Reno’s ankles, prompting him to spread his legs slightly. It was an awkward position, but Valentine was helping him keep his balance, arms steadying him. Tseng aligned himself - and pushed. And how insane it felt, how intense, how fucking hot - everything and all that Reno wanted. His eyes shut instantly, and he bit down on his own lip, close to drawing blood. As soon as Tseng was all the way in, he was able to straighten up a bit, his cheek against Valentine's shoulder, his face buried in the nook of his neck. Definitely more comfortable than being fucked raw against a bare wall. The 'fucked raw' part he didn’t mind, just the wall.

Tseng moved, with clear purpose and intent, steadily. Valentine grabbed Reno by the hair, pulling him away from his shoulder, and fucking devouring his mouth. His hands were everywhere, everywhere that mattered, one burning hot, one slightly cooler and razor sharp. Reno felt it nick sensitive skin more than once, but it only added to the experience. He couldn't keep his hands on Valentine any longer, having to brace against the wall, but the other man didn’t seem to mind them moving away from his skin. Instead he leaned back against the wall again and stared Reno right in the eyes, a wicked smirk playing on his lips. 

“Between a rock and a hard place they say. More like between a wall and a rock hard cock.” Laughing, he moved his nimble hand, wrapping it around Reno’s cock, long slender fingers calloused and warm. Moving expertly.  _ Oh fuck. _

Reno fell forward against him again, caught between his strong hand and Tseng’s thrusts. Then Tseng’s fist was in his hair, yanking his head back. “Look at him,” Tseng hissed between clenched teeth, forcing Reno to stare into Valentine’s eyes. “Watch us,” he continued, aimed at Valentine. 

Sharp, angled thrust after thrust, the sharp, but still welcome pain from Tseng’s fingers pulling his hair, Valentine’s hand moving in unison, Reno couldn’t handle it. His breaths shortened, until the stopped, caught in his throat. Not breathing, he felt himself close to blacking out, pinpoint stars at the edge of his vision, so close, so close, until something gave, and he arched sharply. The following scream also caught, it never passed his lips, as he crashed hard, came hard. 

Exhausted, he was only kept on his legs by Tseng’s fist in his hair, his cock in his ass, and Valentine’s shoulder. Barely conscious, he felt Tseng follow him, felt a fullness inside he hadn’t in quite a while, and felt teeth that dug into the side of his neck. Tseng’s teeth, marking him. That would be something to try to explain away in their locker rooms for the foreseeable future.

Quicker than he had expected, Tseng pulled away, stood up. He pulled Reno with him, Letting him lean against his side, still steady on his feet - which was more than Reno could claim to be. “Still one left,” Tseng whispered in his ear, and Reno looked up, seeing Valentine against the wall, eyes closed, hand on his own cock. 

“This is for you to watch and enjoy,” Tseng continued, voice still barely a whisper in Reno’s ear. Tseng helped Reno sit down, his legs weak beneath him. In the middle of a pile of their collective clothing, no less. Then he straightened and sauntered over to Valentine. His hand touched Valentine’s jaw, gently, causing him to open his eyes again, looking into Tseng’s. Reno saw they were unfocused, glazed. Distant. A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Tseng,” Valentine breathed, barely a ghost of a word. So far gone, so close. Without hesitation, Tseng put his hands on Valentine’s hips and flipped their positions, positioning himself against the wall. Valentine seemed to come to life, something in him tensing, straightening his spine, his head snapping up and staring at Tseng properly. 

“Get that cock of yours wet, and fuck me,” Tseng spoke, voice loud enough for Reno to hear as well. The reply from Valentine was nothing more than a string of profanities, some of them rivalling Reno’s worst. 

Seeing a vial on the floor by the pile of clothing he was sitting on, Reno guessed at it being whatever Tseng had used to slick up, so he lazily, but somewhat carefully kicked it towards them, hearing it clink against the wall by Valentine's feet. Looking down, Valentine realized what it was and in a flash of movement had the vial in hands, open, pouring the liquid into his palm. 

“Yes, Tseng. As you wish,” he whispered, wrapping his hand around his own cock, coating it in the slick hastily. Then Tseng grabbed hold of his shoulders, pulling himself up until he had his legs wrapped around Valentine’s waist, Valentine’s strong arms supporting him as well. 

Reno awed. Fuck, Tseng was strong. Ever the warrior in a business suit disguise. He watched wide eyed as Tseng basically lowered himself onto Valentine’s cock, just guided by the other’s arms and hands, no preparation. It had to sting, had to burn, but the expression on Tseng’s face, if fucking killed him again. Tseng’s eyes closed, his mouth fell open and his head tilted back. Long fingers tangled in Valentine’s hair - dude had to have a long hair fetish, for sure. 

And Valentine thrust, thrust with the confidence of someone knowing he wasn’t hurting his partner, thrust with intent and precision. Reno stared at Tseng’s face - another image burned into his mind, another one to haunt his dreams for years to come. Even though Tseng was the one being fucked, Reno felt his own breath speed up, follow their rhythm. Too worn out to do anything else, he could  _ feel _ it resonate within him.  _ Fuuuck _ . So hot, so strong, so beautiful. He watched as Tseng’s face changed, tense again, close, so close. He watched as Valentine’s gauntlet dug hard enough into Tseng’s skin draw blood, little droplets forming on tan skin. He watched as Valentine’s head snapped back as he came with a growl, that waterfall of black hair cascading down his back in a following wave.

He saw Tseng snap his mouth shut, hard enough to rattle teeth, as he came once more, Valentine’s cock deep in his ass, and his hand on Tseng’s cock. 

He watched them slump against the wall, Valentine barely able to keep them upright until Tseng had untangled fingers from hair and his legs from Valentine’s waist. 

He watched as they, as well, ended up on the floor, legs weak, muscles exhausted. 

And then he slumped to the side, eyes too heavy to keep open, legs and arms unable to move, mind filled with sounds, scents and images to keep him horny for years. 

He fell asleep in less than a minute.

—

“I said it would work,” Vincent chuckled. 

“So you did,” Tseng replied, voice slightly raspy and wavering, just a little less stern than usual. “But you do realize he fell asleep on a pile of all our clothes, right? Either we wake him again, or this,” he pointed to the naked forms,”is it for the night.”

Vincent laughed, a short chuckle. “You’ll keep me warm, won’t you? And we still have a fire and a pot of tea. We’ll keep warm. Anything for some peace and quiet. Just don’t call in out extraction until he’s up and we get out clothes back.”

“Worst idea ever, Valentine.”

“Best worst idea ever. Look at him, sleeping like a lamb, wasn’t that what you wanted?”

“Fuck you,  _ Vin _ .”

“That’s no way to speak to your elders, Tseng.”

“Fuck you, twice over. Minus the years you spent in a coffin, we’re not that far apart in age - I’ll talk to you however I want.  _ Vin _ .”

Vincent chuckled again, turning one of Tseng’s super stern glares directed his way. “You know you love me.”

“I wouldn’t say that. On a good day, I like you. On a drunk day, I’ll fuck you. On a bad day… You don’t want to know. “

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You’re too easy to rile up. Time for a cup of calming hot tea.”

—

Sitting side by side, naked as the day they were born, drinking tea, felt odd. But at least Reno wasn’t pacing a trail in the floor and sighing every 3 seconds. Tseng had managed to pull Vincent’s cape lose enough from under Reno to drape a corner over his sleeping form, so he shouldn’t become too cold during the night. 

Finally some peace and quiet. Tseng rested his head on Vincent’s shoulder, the prerogative of being just a bit shorter. 

“What are the chances we can convince him it was all a dream?” he asked, laughter in his voice. “He’ll be a constant pain in my ass from now on.”   


Vincent laughed loudly. “He wishes”.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, not sorry, 8k+ words of smut in two evenings. I still blame the Remake trailers, they make me giddy as fuck. But do enjoy, if you feel like it. I have no idea if it was any good, been so long since I actively wrote fanfic - but my silly, head-canon Turk-muses have been awoken. This is the silly, dirty result result. For now, proofread at 2.30AM. Will fix any mistakes I've missed another time.


End file.
